Confession #1: I love truth and I love theology.
I have great respect for healthy debate and I deeply appreciate the work of the early apologists and theologians who fought for sound doctrine. These pioneers of the faith toiled long and hard in the salt mines of theology to sift fact from fiction and spirit from flesh. I am in awe (and a little envious) of such skilled intellect.
I’m not under the illusion that the debates of Athanasius and Augustine were a lot more elevated than those of today, but they were at least a little more contained, lacking the viral capabilities of our rapid-fire technology. Now it seems that disagreements fueled by facebook and You Tube devolve into Christian WWF matches by the time the second comment is posted. Maybe these disputes are necessary to keep truth clear and strong, but I wonder why it seems we enjoy it so much. Then I remember my own nature, which brings me to confession #2.
Confession #2: I love being right.
I have in the past trolled books and blogs, looking for error rather than common ground, maybe even subconsciously searching for stones to throw and splinters to pick with my Truth Tweezers. It’s bad behavior, but it uses big words and wears a very fancy hat.
Confession #3: I don’t think I have the stomach for it anymore.
My theology over the past two years has grown increasingly simple and increasingly strong. I used to have an opinion on everything. Everything.
But now I know a lot less about most things, and a lot more about a very few things. I no longer have the energy to defend my opinions – but bigger than that, I no longer see them as being at risk. If what I believe is really truth, then it will stand whether anyone agrees or not. And one of the greatest truths I could ever communicate is the truth that God is – of all things – kind*. My own opinions sound to me like the bells on Christmas morning, but to others I’m sure they have often been clanging cymbals, crashing over the sweet song of His kindness.
And I feel pretty done with that.
I don’t think He needs me to defend Him; He’s asked me to demonstrate Him. A real-life display of His goodness is a much more difficult gig than dancing on bully-pulpits that make us two feet taller than our opponents, but still a million miles short of the heart of God.
So, what’s a girl to do, then, with the theology she loves to study? Use it to become more and more in love with Jesus, that’s what. And if I can manage this trick of loving Him better than I ever have, I think the odds are good that I will also love more like Him than I ever have.
And love never fails.
That’s all for today.
P.S. Congratulations, Krista Dowding, you’ve won a ticket to The Well Conference in May! Shoot me your email address and I’ll get you signed up!
*Titus 3:4-5; Col. 3:12; Eph. 2:7; Romans 2:4